Hustle culture dropout

my soft life conversion story

This post is inspired by

The Nish Perspective

piece on Why I No Longer Subscribe to the Hustle Mentality. Since the start of this year, I’ve promised myself to figure out how to be productive without losing my mind or sanity. Once upon a time, I was that die-hard hustler, convinced that if I wasn’t juggling 17 projects at once, I wasn’t really working. I’d wear my productivity on my sleeve like a badge of honor, believing that my worth was tied to how much I could cram into my calendar. Spoiler: this led to two major mental health crises, burnt-out brain cells, and, yes, even missed paychecks. That “hustle ’til you drop” mantra? Totally messed me up.

Fast forward to today, I’m all about the "soft life." That means self-care, actual boundaries, and putting my mental health first—finally! I had to do a serious audit of my life, Marie Kondo-style, and throw out projects that weren’t bringing me either money or peace. I’m talking about projects that left me exhausted, distracted, and overextended, with little to show for it. Even my therapist and psychiatrist gently pointed out that I was doing way too much. And when your care team steps in with a “hey, maybe take it down a notch,” it’s time to listen. So, I did.

And you know what? It’s incredible how much more productive I am when I’m not trying to do everything all at once. Here’s how I finally broke free from the hustle trap and created space for a softer, more manageable life:

---

Step 1: Take a Project Detox

First things first, I had to cut back. Some of the projects I was involved in were neither paying the bills nor aligning with any big-picture goals. They were just … there, cluttering up my time and mental space. I realized these “opportunities” weren’t actually helping me reach my real goals—they were more like traps keeping me from doing work that actually mattered. So, I let them go, one by one. Did it feel like ripping off a band-aid? Yes. But every time I said no, I felt a little lighter, a little more in control.

And then, I felt my focus shift. Projects I truly cared about came into focus. Suddenly, I had the time to build my blog, work on my book, and map out creative ideas I’d only daydreamed about before. Letting go made room for what I wanted to hold on to.

Step 2: Setting Actual Boundaries (for Myself and Others)

With the soft life in mind, I set some serious ground rules. I started letting clients know my office hours and held firm: no emails on weekends, no texts past a certain hour, and no frantic check-ins at midnight. At first, my brain went into a mini-panic—Would people think I was lazy? Irresponsible? But then, I noticed that clients actually respected the boundaries I set, and I found myself with the time and energy I didn’t think I’d ever have.

But boundaries also meant holding myself accountable. This is where things got real. I had to commit to saying “no” to opportunities that used to lure me in, and it turns out, rejecting an interesting project is hard when you’re used to chasing everything. But I learned that every “no” meant a “yes” to my own peace.

Step 3: Prioritize Self-Care (and Mean It)

In the hustle days, self-care was something I “earned” after ticking off everything on my to-do list. But as I transitioned into the soft life, I learned that self-care isn’t just spa days or face masks—it’s about genuinely protecting my mental, physical, and emotional well-being.

My new self-care routine looks like:

• Getting at least seven hours of sleep each night. No late-night work sessions!

• Going to the beach often.

• Meditating each morning, exercising, and reading before the day begins.

• Giving my creative projects time and attention without feeling rushed.

I’m not saying I’m perfect at all of this, but I’m making a solid effort to build these habits into my life. And it’s been eye-opening: I’m realizing I’m way more efficient now because I’m actually rested and mentally present.

The Soft Life Isn’t Just About Chilling

When people hear “soft life,” some assume it’s about lounging around with nothing on your plate. For me, though, the soft life is about taking full control of where my energy goes. It’s about being intentional—no more burning myself out for anyone or anything that doesn’t add value to my life.

In the past, I couldn’t even imagine making time for the things I loved, but now? With clear boundaries, a purposeful schedule, and a little extra grace for myself, I’m able to get things done without the burnout. I’m accomplishing more in a week than I used to in a month, and it feels natural, even easy.

---

How the Soft Life Keeps Surprising Me

What’s funny is that the more I settle into this soft life, the more surprises it throws my way. I expected to feel a little calmer, sure, but what I didn’t expect was how much this lifestyle change would shift my outlook on everything. I’m starting to notice the beauty of life’s quiet, everyday moments—the satisfaction of a fully checked-off to-do list without the frantic scrawling, the joy of an uninterrupted cup of tea, and the peace that comes from knowing I don’t owe every second to productivity. These small moments keep grounding me, and they’ve become the real benchmarks of success.

Another thing? I’m becoming way more intentional with the people I let into my world. When I was hustling, my social life looked like a networking event 24/7. Now, I’m focusing on friendships that fill me up rather than drain me, and I’m careful about who I give my energy to. The people in my life right now are supportive, grounded, and unafraid to call me out if I’m slipping back into old habits. Having that support system reminds me of why I made this choice in the first place.

As I keep leaning into this soft life, I’m learning that a lot of what I once saw as “essentials” were just weights in disguise. The hustle mentality had me convinced that rest was a reward, not a necessity, but soft living has taught me that peace is the foundation. This journey isn’t about aiming lower or doing less, it’s about redefining what it means to be successful—on my own terms, and in my own time.

Recommended Substack Read

Celebrate the Gift of Closed Doors by

🌻 A Year of Mental Health

Writer Chris Guillebeau presents a compelling counter-argument to the popular belief that "it's never too late," highlighting that, in reality, some things in life do come with real deadlines.

Celebrate the Gift of Closed Doors