Shameless because who gives a f*ck
from overthinking to over it
My confidence took a nosedive over the past few years, and honestly? It wasn’t cute. I was out here shrinking, questioning everything, overthinking myself into oblivion, and convincing myself that everyone was watching me fail in real-time like it was an episode of Love & Hip Hop: My Self-Esteem Edition. I became obsessed with how people saw me—how I looked, how I was perceived, whether I was doing enough or being enough. I was in a toxic, codependent relationship with comparison, scrolling through social media with the energy of an ex who just knows you moved on to someone finer.
I wish I could say I had some grand epiphany in a candlelit room after a deep meditation session, but no. I simply got tired. Tired of doubting myself. Tired of asking for permission to exist boldly. Tired of tiptoeing around my own damn life.
So, I started asking myself: Why do I care so much?
Because let’s be honest—no one really cares. Everyone is busy starring in the movie of their life, which means I was out here treating myself like an unpaid extra when I should’ve been playing the lead.
The People Who Just Don’t Give a F*ck
I’ve always admired those people. You know the ones—the shameless, fearless, “I’m just gonna do this and see what happens” types. The people who don’t overthink every move, who aren’t bound by the imaginary expectations society has placed on them.
And I’m not talking about the inconsiderate assholes who live their lives with reckless disregard for other people’s feelings. I mean the people who try things just because they can. The ones who start businesses with zero experience. The ones who travel solo without a full itinerary. The ones who post their thoughts online without a second guess. The ones who confidently submit resumes for jobs they’re only 60% qualified for and still get hired.
They move with this kind of quiet, unshakable knowing. And I realized—I want that. I deserve that.
So, I made a list. Just a simple one in my Notes app—nothing fancy, nothing I’d laminate and put on my wall. Just a list of sh*t I actually want to do this year. And for the first time in a long time, I’m looking at it with the energy of Oh, I’m getting this done. No question.
Why? Because I have nothing to lose.
Failure Is Just Data, Baby
I used to look at failure like it was this big, shameful thing. Something to avoid at all costs, something that would prove I wasn’t good enough. But nah. Failure is just data. It’s the universe saying, “Okay, that didn’t work. Try again.” It’s a damn science experiment. You try one formula, see what happens, adjust, and keep it moving. The only people who never fail are the ones who never try. And that? That’s the real failure.
I refuse to be that person.
Doechii Energy: Bet On Yourself
Speaking of not giving a f*ck, can we talk about Doechii for a second? There’s this video of her from five years ago on YouTube where she talks about losing her job but deciding she wasn’t about to sit around feeling sorry for herself. Instead, she just walked into record labels and asked if they had internships. Just like that. The audacity! The sheer confidence! Imagine getting fired and immediately pivoting to, “Okay, let me just go knock on some doors and see who wants to give me a shot.”
Fast forward, and last year, she dropped Alligator Bites Never Heal, got sober, got intentional, and let her art do the talking. Initially, the project didn’t shake the internet, but the people who did hear it? They felt it. She went on tour, started doing TV appearances, and next thing you know—three Grammy nominations. And last Sunday, she won Best Rap Album.
Sis bet on herself. And won.
So Here’s Where I’m At…
I’m fully stepping into my shameless era. No more overthinking. No more doubting myself into inaction. No more waiting for the perfect time, because surprise—there’s no such thing. I’m showing up for myself, taking up space, and doing everything I said I wanted to do.
If I want it, I’m going after it.
If I fail? Cool. I’ll try again.
If people talk? So what?
Regret is more painful than fear. So I’m moving forward. I’m betting on myself. And I suggest you do the same.
Welcome to the Shameless era. You in?
🥰
Your there!!! Going boldly